


The Rub

by hellokatzchen (Bether)



Series: Alphabet Meme [13]
Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Betaed, Canon Compliant, Gen, Humor, Innuendo, Misunderstandings, One Shot, POV Male Character, POV Third Person, Past Tense, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-23
Updated: 2015-02-23
Packaged: 2018-03-14 20:56:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3425309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bether/pseuds/hellokatzchen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Q is for Quickie | It's not eavesdropping when you're the captain.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Rub

**Author's Note:**

  * For [livelovehump](https://archiveofourown.org/users/livelovehump/gifts).



> For the prompt "quickie" with McCoy/Chapel (well, it's kind of implied). Set post-2009!film, no spoilers/references to Into Darkness. Thanks to izzyb for betaing-- your feedback and help with the naming process were indispensable.
> 
>  **Disclaimer:** Characters mentioned are used without permission and are trademarks of CBS/Gene Roddenberry. I do not own them and am simply borrowing for my purposes. Please don't sue.

One of James T. Kirk's favorite hobbies on the  _Enterprise_ was annoying his Chief Medical Officer. And one of the things that annoyed the man most was barging into his office unannounced. Jim was about to do so when he heard a surprisingly interesting conversation taking place inside.

"C'mon, Chapel-- just a quickie."

"Oh all right. But you owe me one, Leonard McCoy-- and don't think I won't collect."

"Wouldn't dream of it."

Christine snorted. "Sure you wouldn't."

"Oh, hush, woman. You know I--  _shit_."

"Had a feeling that'd get your attention."

"Uh, yeah." He took a sharp breath. "Well don't _stop._ "

She laughed softly. "Wouldn't dream of it, Doctor."

"Smartass."

"Remember whose hands you're in."

"As if I could forget-- you're a goddess, Chapel."

"So you _can_ sweet talk a lady. Will wonders ever cease?"

"You're lucky you're so good with your hands otherwise I'd've written you up for insubordination a long time ago."

"You? Mister I-can't-say-anything-appropriate-to-the-XO-unless-it's-for-the-absolute-safety-of-the-crew? Love to see that conversation."

"One has nothing to do with the other."

"Mmhmmm."

"All right-- less back talking, more back _rubbing._ "

Jim's jaw dropped. He pressed the door release and marched inside to find Christine Chapel standing behind Leonard McCoy's chair, her hands resting on his shoulders. He pointed an accusing finger at his best friend. "I am supremely disappointed in you, Bones."

Visibly irritated, Leonard glared. "What have I told you about barging in here, Jim?"

Jim ignored him. "Seriously? This is your version of a quickie?" He shook his head. " _Supremely_ disappointed."

Leonard rolled his eyes. "Are you trying to tell me you want your senior staff having sex while _on duty?_ "

That pretty much pulled the rug out from under him. Jim backpeddled quickly. "No, no. I just--" He huffed. "You suck, Bones."

"Yeah, yeah." Leonard waved him off. "Don't you have a ship to run or something?"

Jim pouted as he swept out of the office again, muttering about his no-fun CMO.

Christine laughed as she watched him go, the doors swishing shut behind him. "He doesn't really think you'd get up to anything naughty in here without locking the doors, does he?"

Leonard leaned his head back to look up at her. "Who cares? Back to rubbin', woman!"

" _Woman?_ " Christine added a bit more pressure than was strictly necessary. "Keep that up and it'll be two you owe me."

With a grunt, Leonard smirked. "Put it on my tab. You know I'm good for it."

Chuckling, Christine refocused on the task at hand. "I do, which is why I always collect. Now shush."


End file.
